Part of the mourning process becomes not just missing the person you said goodbye to, but also examining the person you were, the person you were in relationship to your deceased loved one, and the person you are today.
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As all of the ongoing uncertainty surrounding the pandemic drags on, opinions and advice abound. Recently, regarding parents’ disappointments about the possibility of virtual schooling in the fall, one Facebook post I came across is encouraging parents to “Discuss your frustrations away from the kids”, “be angry or sad in private” and “stay positive”. I wanted to take a moment to deconstruct the myth that we have to hide our emotions from our children. What might it look like to be vulnerable in front of them? Is hiding our emotions from our children missing an opportunity to role model what tolerating uncertainty looks like?
Dear Exhausted Parents,
I see you. I see you carrying the weight of all the world’s issues on your shoulders.
You are grieving. Everyone you know is grieving.
We are all suffering from loss right now in different ways. Some are mourning the loss of their daily work/school/life routines. Some are missing loved ones in quarantine. Some have had to deal with illness or death in their very own households. Many are out of work and suffering from economic hardship. Racial injustice continues at a time when equality is needed more than ever. Access to healthcare is challenging and unaffordable. Loved ones with special needs may have difficulty accessing services. Celebrations and traditions have been placed on hold or modified. This is an unprecedented time of individual and communal loss.
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